These are the UK's 30 most popular names on football shirts
Before we go any further, let's just be clear that any grown adult who walks around with a footballer's name on the back of their shirt needs to be put on some kind of register.
So if your club happens to be well represented in the following list, don't brag about how massive they are, instead feel shame at how many of your fellow fans are a danger to society.
The only two acceptable names here are Mata (thoroughly nice chap) and Tiote (RIP), no need whatsoever for the rest of them...
1. Paul POGBA (Manchester United)
2. Romelu LUKAKU (Manchester United)
3. Eden HAZARD (Chelsea)
4. Alexandre LACAZETTE (Arsenal)
5. Marcus RASHFORD (Manchester United)
6. Harry KANE (Tottenham)
7. Sadio MANE (Liverpool)
8. Lionel MESSI (Barcelona)
9. Philippe COUTINHO (Liverpool)
10. Zlatan IBRAHIMOVIC (Manchester United)
11. DELE Alli (Tottenham)
12. Roberto FIRMINO (Liverpool)
13. Matt RITCHIE (Newcastle)
14. ANDER HERRERA (Manchester United)
15. Cristiano RONALDO (Real Madrid)
16. Henrikh MKHITARYAN (Manchester United)
17. Dwight GAYLE (Newcastle United)
18. NEYMAR JR. (Barcelona/PSG)
19. N’Golo KANTE (Chelsea)
20. Mesut OZIL (Arsenal)
21. John TERRY (Chelsea/Aston Villa)
22. ALEXIS Sanchez (Arsenal)
23. Mohamed SALAH (Liverpool)
24. Wayne ROONEY (Manchester United)
25. Juan MATA (Manchester United)
26. Adam LALLANA (Liverpool)
27. Alvaro MORATA (Chelsea)
28. David DE GEA (Manchester United)
29. Cheick TIOTE (Newcastle United)
30. Christian ERIKSEN (Tottenham)
